I remember the first time we realized we both thought raunchy humor was hilarious.
We were Juniors in high school in Austin’s geometry class. We were sitting in the back row like we always did so we could make each other laugh without getting caught.
Austin was talking about vectors or something that had to do with lines. He was slapping that stick he had with the rubber point against the blackboard like he always did.
I had just told her the story about the kid who got named Two Dogs F___ing because of the tradition that, after giving birth the mother names the kid after the first thing she sees.
She thought it was so funny she couldn’t stop laughing. Her laughter kept getting more intense. She couldn’t help herself.
She started losing control so she put her hand over her mouth.
Her face got red. She had this pleading look on her face. I could see tears forming in her eyes. She looked so funny! Like she was going to explode.
She started moving her head from side to side. Her eyes got real wide. A look of fear, actually. Like she was afraid she was going to lose control. So she put BOTH hands over her mouth and nose (she was a notorious nose snorter).
All I could see were her teary, frantic looking eyes looking at me over the top of both thumbs crossed over the bridge of her nose.
Then her eyes got buggy, like she had a goiter. Her hands were clamped so tightly against her face that she started blowing fart sounds between her fingers.
Her eyes were so red and bugged out you could almost see the veins. A birthmark in the middle of her forehead that you could only see when her face got red, was bulging. And those squeaky fart sounds! Oh my God!
Continued … She started moving her head from side to side while she had a pleading look in her eyes. Like she was pleading with me to do something but, what the hell could I do?