Zumba My Ass … !

Once again he was saddened by the thought that,

“She never thinks i’m funny … !“

most of the things HE thought were funny … SHE thought were either  stupid  or sexually degenerate …

she hated the word ‘’shit’’ which he thought was the funniest word in the english language … !


… and she didn’t think sex was funny which he thought was even funnier than the word shit … !

she used to say, “i don’t appreciate your barnyard humor,’’ 


he remembered the time she stormed out of the room after he said,  ’i’d love to be able to fly like a bird but,

i wouldn’t want to BE a bird because when birds have sex it’s over after a couple of quick thrusts … !“

 she said something over her shoulder as she stormed out of the room …all he heard was … ‘’compared to you … ‘’

he didn’t catch the rest …


(strange as it seems, … he chuckled at the craziness of the situation … )…..

BUT IT’S OK she doesn’t get it most of the time … !’’ he thought … !

“for crying out loud

you can’t connect on everything … !”


… still,  he hoped that occasionally she’d laugh at

what he DID or SAID to BE funny instead of the

unintentional things that happened


she thought were  hilarious … !


like the time he was carrying the groceries in from the car,

tripped over that stupid exercise ball she never used, fell and

broke his shoulder …  !


she laughed so hard she didn’t even hear his pleas to

call 911 … !


(the next day she told him she laughed so hard she peed her pants … !) …..

through the haze of pain he was thinking, ‘’well, at least she’s laughing ..”


but then she got pissed because the exercise ball

hit a nail and went flat …


as she walked out of the room the last thing he heard was …

‘’call 911 yourself you clumsy idiot … it’s all your fault … ! 

continued …

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